Site Title

Since today is free choice and I get to write whatever is on my mind, I think i’m going to write about how stressful it is to have to choose a major when you’re not even sure what you want to do with your life. When it comes to me I’ve never really had a passion for anything, there was something I wanted to do but like everything else the want just goes away. It’s so hard when you’re starting to take classes and you’re not even sure what you’re supposed to be doing with your life. It’s hard enough to have to try to get through with the classes you need to take but what about when the time comes and you need to start taking the classes you have for the degree you want. I wonder why it is so hard for me to pick something or why is it difficult to imagine what kind of career I’ll have when i’m older. Right now I’m a student only and while I want to start working and learn how to drive, I don’t think I can. It seems so hard for me to take those steps into adulthood and get a hold of my life more seriously. I’m just not sure how I’m supposed to do that, it’s scary enough to think about the future and what might become of me but I just feel like I’m behind everyone else. I hate that feeling and it might not be true but I think I make myself feel beneath others for not being the best. Although it’s not right it’s just something I can’t really help, school is everything in my family and making a career for yourself is the only thing that really matters. I am the youngest daughter and even if my siblings didn’t follow the way my parents wanted, that’s just not in the cards for me. I just wish I could find something that I want to do and study for but it’s just so hard. How am I supposed to know what that is? I know I should be putting myself out there and try to find out that answer for myself but I don’t know how to start. It gets even more complicated when it’s hard to go out on your own and take those steps. That’s what I should be doing yet I keep telling myself I am unable. From the time I was a child I knew that this was supposed to be the life for me and that school is the most important thing like all the adults around me would say. But now I catch myself thinking what if I don’t do this? I can’t believe I get those thoughts even after everything I’ve been through to have this life of being a student. I think life is weird and that while it follows a pattern, sometimes it’s really unexpected. I have so many questions about my future and not a single person in the world has an answer to them. I wonder what my future will look like at this rate, there’s so many things Ik curious about but I know I can’t spend all my time thinking of questions that are impossible to answer. I need to start taking those steps into adulthood and find out what my place is the world is. I need to do many things and one of those especially is to stop making excuses and telling myself i’m too scared to do anything. I can shape my own reality and I know that I’m going to be good in the future. When you believe what you say you’re words are powerful and the more you say it the more you believe it. Some careers that I do think about are related to teaching and becoming a teacher but that also seems like a lot to handle.